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a thin line I've been in a very dark place this past week. Tears fall while I'm at work, and I go home and am in bed by 9pm, often with more tears. Artboy calls, and I don't answer them, and he wakes me when he gets home, and I just stay in bed. He keeps telling me that he loves me, over and over. He text messaged me yesterday before he left for work. Left a note for me on the coffee table. And I feel like screaming at him, "Show me!" like Eliza Doolittle does in My Fair Lady. We keep having the same conversation over and over and over, and we obviously aren't getting anywhere, because the same thing keeps happening. It happened again on Wednesday, just a little over a week after our last big fight. Okay. I give up. I can't make him want to spend time with me, and if he doesn't want to turn off that computer for awhile, there isn't a damn thing I can do about it. So go ahead and escape from life and from me every free moment you have. But don't be surprised when you wake up one day and we've grown so far apart because you checked out. We were supposed to take our Disney trip that I won from the radio station at the end of August, but it took him a month to request the time off, and now he can't get it off. He wants me to try to reschedule. I'm just tempted to say screw the entire thing and forget it. Our third anniversary is next week. Happy anniversary to me. |